I wouldn’t blame you if you don’t check in here often, really.

I seem to have wondered off into this lovely little place called Denial and while I was there, I forgot that this place even existed because you see, this place reminds me so much of all the pain that lives outside the borders of Denial. 

So much has happened since I was last in the real world, somwhere inbetween all of this my dear friend, Maritza fell prengant on a GIFT cycle with triplets, the sun was shining in the land of Denial and then the clouds of the real world started coming thru when M lost one of the triplets, making the triplets healthy little twins, a very bittersweet day indeed. In between all of this babies were born, 3 in the last few weeks in fact and people were happy and in love, for a change it warmed my heart.

M went on her merry way to start her new life in George and it was the end of the Mojito club. We were all sad to see her go but know that our friendships will live on because of the strong bonds we have formed through infertility. M, my friend – thank you for being a special friend and we wish you and yours all the best and lots of joy to come! 

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Then our friend Sharon fell pregnant, in fact it was confirmed 3 days after this pic was taken. We were all over the moon for her, it seems that things were finally falling into place with our little group and the view of motherhood was on the horizon. Yesterday Sharon’s beta dropped, we are all devastated for her. I’m hoping against all hope that this isn’t the start of her 7th miscarriage, she and her husband have been thru so much and they really don’t deserve this heartache. Please hope with me that she gets her miracle baby.

In between all this Abbey’s GIFT failed, we all had such high hopes for her. She has also been thru so much and my heart breaks at the thought of all of how she is feeling right now. Infertility is a horrible monster and I so wish that things were different for all of us.

All this has done is bring me back to reality, into the real world where our pain is dulled with time but never forgotten and all it takes is someone close to you feeling that pain and it’s all brought back with such intensity that you feel like you can’t breath. It makes me scared to even think about going there again, it brings back into my mind the fact that our next IVF is not a guarantee and then it makes me think of the last conversation with Dr V which isn’t something I’ve been able to face at all. I.JUST.CAN’T.DO.IT

In other news – our house is sold. Everything is going according to plan and we should move at the end of November this year. Abi and Murphy are doing well, they both had ringworm which I pressume is from the cats coming into our garden at night but they seem to be getting better and continue to bring Frank and I much joy. Will post some updated pics soon, you wont believe how big they have gotten!

That’s it for now folks….I hope you are all well.

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